The other evening, my son was telling me something, an excited stream of words about a school project, while I sat replying to an email. I nodded along, “Hmm… hmm…” until he suddenly asked, “So what did I just say?”
I froze. I had no idea.
He looked at me and said softly, “You’re always so engrossed in your laptop.”
His words were not angry… they were observant. In that instant, I realized how sharply children notice, reflect, and respond. In their own way, they already lead – through awareness, initiative, empathy, and honesty.
That night, I found myself reflecting on The Leadership Challenge by Kouzes and Posner, a framework that speaks about five key practices of leadership. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that our children exhibit these behaviours naturally. They lead – through curiosity, courage, and heart, long before titles or teams enter their world.
Our role is simply to notice these sparks and help them grow brighter.
Model the Way
Table of Contents
That day, when he called me out for not listening, I didn’t defend myself. I closed my laptop and said, “You’re right, I wasn’t really there. Tell me again?”
He smiled, and began from the start.
Children model the way without realizing it. They hold a mirror to us through their honesty and consistency. When we acknowledge our slips instead of hiding them, we reinforce the same authenticity we admire in them. Leadership often begins with that quiet courage to name the truth.
Inspire a Shared Vision
Every family has small shared missions. Ours started with something as simple as reducing screen time. Instead of announcing a rule, I asked, “What would you like to do if we weren’t on screens this Sunday?” He thought for a second and said, “We could make pancakes or play Uno.”
When we invite children to imagine with us, we see their natural ability to create and rally others around an idea. They don’t need authority to inspire, just enthusiasm, inclusion, and purpose.
Challenge the Process
During a festival once, I asked him to join the pooja and touch elders’ feet. He frowned, “But why do we do this, Mom?” Caught off guard, I replied, “Because that’s what we’ve always done.”
He thought for a moment and said, “But shouldn’t we know why before doing it?”
That gentle question made me smile and squirm. It reminded me that challenging the process is not defiance; it’s curiosity seeking meaning. When children ask “why,” they are not resisting, they are refining. And if we can hold space for that, we teach them that innovation starts with inquiry.
Enable Others to Act
One afternoon, I had gone for a meeting that ran longer than expected. By the time I returned, lunch was ready. My son had spoken to the cook, checked the fridge, decided what could be made and of course, included pancakes for himself.
When I asked how he managed, he shrugged and said, “I didn’t want to disturb you; I knew I could handle it.”
That small act of initiative showed me how naturally children lead when given trust. They don’t wait for permission; they act from confidence and care. Real empowerment begins when we step aside just enough for them to step forward.
Encourage the Heart
Children understand appreciation deeply. After a school project, I told him, “I loved how you didn’t give up even when it wasn’t working.” He smiled and whispered, “You noticed that, didn’t you?”
They too crave acknowledgment that sees effort, not outcome. Encouraging the heart theirs or ours, fuels resilience and joy.
If we tune in,even in small moments between chores and calls, we’ll notice leadership unfolding in curious questions, quiet decisions, and acts of care. Our job is not to manufacture leaders but to recognise the ones already growing among us, to point them out, and to believe in them. And sometimes, when a child leads with simple honesty and love, we are the ones who walk away changed, reminded that greatness often arrives in little shoes.
